How to Ask for Help

Freshman Year · Health · Required Lesson

How to Ask for Help

25–30 minutes Medium Required

Destination

By the end of this conversation, the mentee should be able to name at least two trusted adults they could go to and practice one way to start that conversation.

Stop 1 of 4

Talk

Goal: Understand how the mentee currently handles hard moments—who they go to, or whether they tend to handle things alone.

“Asking for help isn’t a sign that you can’t handle things. It’s a sign that you know the difference between struggling alone and getting support—and that takes real strength.”

Choose three to five questions

1. When something’s really bothering you, who do you usually talk to—if anyone?
2. Has it ever felt hard or embarrassing to ask for help? What made it hard?
3. Has there ever been a time someone helped you and it made a real difference?
4. What would make it easier for you to ask someone for help in the future?
5. Is there a difference for you between asking a friend for help versus asking an adult?
Mentor Tip: For many young people—especially those who’ve experienced instability or have been let down by adults before—asking for help doesn’t come naturally. Approach this with patience, not urgency, and let the mentee set the pace.

Stop 2 of 4

Learn

Asking for help is a skill, not a weakness

Everyone needs help sometimes—including adults. Knowing when and how to ask is a skill that gets easier with practice, just like any other skill.

Route 21 Big Idea:
You don’t have to figure everything out alone. Having people you can turn to isn’t a backup plan for when you’re weak—it’s part of building a strong, sustainable life.

What makes someone a “trusted adult”

Listens without judgingThey hear you out before jumping to conclusions or lectures.
Follows throughThey actually do what they say they’ll do.
Respects your privacy—within reasonThey keep most things between you, but will act if your safety is at risk.

Different helpers for different needs

Who Can Help With What
👨‍🏫Teacher or coach — school stress, a specific class, or everyday problem-solving
🧑‍⚕️School counselor or therapist — ongoing stress, anxiety, or anything that feels like more than you can carry alone
🧑‍🤝‍🧑Mentor — a steady, ongoing person to talk through life in general
👪Family member or caregiver — depending on your relationship and situation

How to actually start the conversation

You don’t need the perfect words. A simple, honest opening is enough:

“Hey, can I talk to you about something? I’ve been feeling kind of stressed and I’m not sure what to do about it.”
“I don’t really know how to say this, but I need some help with something.”

What shouldn’t stay a secret

Most things can stay between you and a trusted adult. But if you or someone you know is in danger—thoughts of self-harm, abuse, or an unsafe situation—that’s information a trusted adult needs to know, even if it feels hard to share.

If it’s urgent: Call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) anytime, day or night, for free and confidential support—for yourself or if you’re worried about someone else.

Stop 3 of 4

Try

Build your support list

Name a few real people the mentee could actually go to—not a hypothetical list, but people who exist in their life right now.

For school stuff___________
For something personal___________
For an emergency___________

Practice an opening line

Pick one real thing you could bring up with a trusted adult this week. What’s one sentence you could use to start that conversation?

Choose Your Route

Pick the video that best fits your time and interest today. You only need to watch one.

Level 1 · Quick Stop

How To Ask for Help

Approximately 3–5 minutes

A short, direct look at why it’s normal to find asking for help embarrassing—and why it’s worth doing anyway.

Watch the Quick Stop
Talk afterward: Did the video describe a feeling you’ve had about asking for help?

Level 2 · Scenic Route

Identifying Trusted Adults: Who Can You Rely On?

Approximately 5–8 minutes

A closer look at how to spot safe, reliable adults in your life and what makes someone trustworthy.

Take the Scenic Route
Talk afterward: Does anyone in your life match the traits described in the video?

Level 3 · Open Road

Supporting Teen Mental Health

Approximately 10–15 minutes

A broader look at what it means for teens to have a safe space and supportive adults to turn to.

Explore the Open Road
Talk afterward: What stood out to you about what makes support actually feel helpful?
Mentor Reminder: Let the mentee choose the route whenever possible. The support list built above matters more than the video.

Stop 4 of 4

Grow

Reflection

Who’s one person on your support list you feel most comfortable going to?
What’s one thing that would make it easier for you to actually reach out when you need to?
Is there something on your mind right now that you might want to talk to someone about?
What questions do you still have?

A small next step

Asking for help doesn’t have to start big. Reaching out about something small this week can make it easier when something bigger comes up later.

How can your mentor help?

How can Route 21 help?

Would it help to have a list of counseling or support resources available to you outside of this conversation?
Mentor Wrap-Up:
Did the mentee name real, specific people—not just categories? If anything they shared today suggests they need support beyond what a mentor relationship can provide, follow up to help connect them with a counselor or other professional.